Annual Review

I just had my annual review. Without going into much detail, I did very well - overall, I scored a 4/5 in our company's rating system. I'm an asset to the team and to the company. Everybody I work with loves me. Not bad.

But yet, i'm left feeling a bit dissatisfied. I don't feel as if it was a constructive review. I don't know what to change, what to improve on. Well, my supervisor did say I should focus more on the company's bottom line and be more results driven. But...give me some quantitative goals and i'll do it! That's the problem...it's not like i'm in a sales capacity where I have numbers to meet. Everything is left kind of up in the air. My boss wants me to grow within the company, but it would be nice if I had some sort of path I could follow. Yes, I would like to grow within the company as well, but I honestly don't have a clue how or where I would even begin. She also said the worst thing would be if I one day told her that i'm bored and leaving for another position at another company.

As i'm sitting here mulling over my review, i'm wondering what kind of questions to ask my boss. I did ask her several questions during my review, but she was never able to give me a specific answer. The next step is for us to sit down and set up goals for the year.

And oh yeah, a salary raise wasn't discussed at all. She didn't even mention anything about it. When I had accepted my offer, HR told me that pay increases were given during the annual review. Well...you'd think that with a 4/5, i'd get some sort of increase? Or at least say something about the crappy economy and how that has impacted raises and the company has put a freeze on them? Should I bring it up?

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Small Rant about shirts

I am rather annoyed by the fact that I can't seem to find any blouses/shirts that are long enough to tuck into my jeans/trousers. They all have that awkard length - too long to wear untucked, but too short to tuck in because once I start moving around, the ends inevitably find themselves untucked. This is driving me crazy!

And if I do manage to find shirts that are long enough to be tucked in, their shape is utterly horrible because they are not fitted. It's like they were made for men.

Where on earth can I find nice, fitted, kind of stretchy shirts that are long enough to tuck in?

And don't get me started on the little gap by the buttons that appears in the chest area. I don't even have big boobs, yet that stupid little gap always appears. Nothing that some fashion tape won't fix, but still! Why can't they get the women's blouse right??

Both of these problems apply to my high-end blouses, and also my cheaper blouses from Zara.

Rant over. Still searching for the perfect blouse.

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Obsessed with grey

Crap. I said I wouldn't think about shopping anymore. Yet here I am, picking out grey purses and shoes that I might (I said might) end up buying for fall. I love the color grey, it's so soothing. My favorite color is still blue, but grey comes close. I mean, my car is grey! Love it. Purse by Marc by Marc Jacobs and shoes by Kate Spade, both can be found on piperlime.

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World, meet Ralph

Ralph - said in a German accent.

2009 VW GTI. Upgrade from my 2003 VW Golf (Golfy). I'm keeping it in the VW family for now, because I love their product. Golfy gave me trouble towards the end, but I blame it on the year that my brother had my car and probably didn't take care of it as well as I did. I've been eyeing this car for a while. It was between this or the MINI Cooper S. Since my brother has the MINI S, I figured i'd go for the GTI. Now we can switch cars whenever we feel like it (and i've gotten better at driving stick!).

Ok, enough shopping for now. Let's do a re-cap of my big ticket purchases the past few months:

Ticket to Hong Kong
Laptop
Several pairs of designer shoes
2009 GTI

I think that's enough for the rest of the year. Although I am flying to Singapore and Jakarta in December. All I can say is, I am so grateful for my wonderful parents. Thank you for everything. I am truly blessed.

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Clarity

I'm sure that by now everybody knows about The Sartorialist.

Well, it's one of my favorite websites. I love looking at the people, their clothes, their expressions...they are all so beautiful in their own way. Head on over if you've lived under a rock and never heard of it.

The book is out as well!

***

Went for a two mile run today. It felt great. I've been breathing really weird the past few days - think short, shallow breaths as opposed to deep, full breaths. Well, the run brought my breathing back to normal. I think i'm just stressed out. Maybe I need to take a few yoga classes.

I've been stressing out a lot recently. I'm kind of confused. I don't know what to do with my life. There are so many things to do, so many places to see, so many opportunities to pursue. I wish things were a little more clear. Do I want to go to graduate school? My dad has been bugging me to take the GMAT. I haven't even cracked open my GMAT practice book. Then, one of my dad's friends asked if i'd be interested to work for him. I'd love to, but now is not the time. As much as I miss my family, i'm not ready to move back to Jakarta. Plus, I love my job here.

As much as I want to blaze my own path and be successful on my own, i'm afraid of messing up and having to rely on my family again. Not that there's anything wrong with that - relying on my family. Except sometimes I start to wonder if maybe they see me as a failure? I could have an easy life back home, yet I choose to make things difficult for myself? I don't know...I don't want the easy way out, but I definitely don't want to suffer either. Eh.

Part of me is still a kid. I don't want to grow up and have responsibilities and worry about things. But hello, I need to open my eyes and realize that i'm not getting younger. I know the whole thing about setting goals for oneself - but what if you have too many options? Or none at all? Then what? I've been pushing myself to write down my 5 year plan. So far, I know this: buy a dog, get my masters, travel, earn more money, be happy be fit. I'm not being very specific, I know, but for blogging purposes, I won't be specific. Do I want kids and start a family? I don't know. I honestly don't see it in my 5 year plan. My future is just a big jumbled up, blurry image right now. But that's ok. I guess the beauty of it is that i'll get to unblur (is that a word?) everything over time.

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Overpriced crap

THIS is what you get for living in a $4,000/month* condo.



Yup. At 3:30 am, I woke up to a dripping noise. I thought there was a ghost in my room. (I have seen too many horror movies and was prepared to see the ghost of a drowned person, lol!) I turned on the light on the nightstand, just in time to witness a chunk of the ceiling falling down. Yes, I let out a little scream. My guess is the A/C caused a leak somewhere.

I called management several times and left a few voicemails while I was at work. This is unacceptable! And for them to not have returned my call yet! What the hell!

*Please don't hate. My brother is sharing this place with a friend. My parents are willing to pay for it, and i'm staying here for the time being. I personally would not be willing or able to spend/afford $4,000/month!

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Trip or treats

For all your foodies (and lovers of traveling) out there. My roomie (ex-roomie) has started a blog. Finally! Yay!

Check it out.

http://triportreats.blogspot.com

Enjoy.

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Time for a new car

And so the time has come for me to say goodbye to my current car, and get a new one.

If anybody knows any great reads (like other blogger's car buying experiences) or car buying tips, please let me know. I've done my research online, I know which car I want. I think the hard part for me is negotiating, but I have help on that front. I am not going the used car route.

I also have to sell my car, which in itself is a hassle, but the dealerships offered me seriously crappy estimates, when I know they will sell the car for $5,000-$8000 more. Any advice/tips for selling a car are also greatly appreciated.

On another note, I closed my Twitter account because it became too distracting (especially at work) and I found myself constantly checking my iPhone. I don't have an addictive personality, but it was getting to be a bit too much.

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Apology

This one's for you. You know who you are. I will keep it brief because I don't want to dig up the past or bring up things I want to forget. I know privacy is important to you as well, so i'll be vague.

I'm sorry. Never meant to do it. Can't turn back time, so we'll have to live with it. Sorry.

Oh. And Happy Birthday! And good luck.

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I love watches

I am lusting after:


Drool. It's so big. And it looks amazing on my wrist. But I already have a smaller version of this with the most beautiful blue strap, which I have to special order because the leather is worn out. Last time it took them 3 months to get me the strap. I don't know how long it will take this time around. The blue of my strap is my favorite color and i'll be sad if Cartier tells me they don't make it anymore. I've never seen that blue on anybody else or on any other Cartier watch for that matter. I also need to get a new battery for it. I can't find a picture of it in my iPhoto, but it has made an appearance on this blog before.

And while I was in Hong Kong, I took one of my dad's watches, which is this one:

(From: Time of Switzerland site)

It's nice and big for my wrist. It does this thing where you push the face to the side, and it reverses to protect it, revealing a gold backplate (is that even the correct term? Lol!). It works great for polo, because you protect the face of your watch. I love big watches, and I love men's watches. Plus, having something of my dad's so close to me, makes me feel good. It's one of his favorite day-time watches, but since he loves watches as much as I do, he has a whole lot more where this came from. It doesn't look manly on me at all, in fact, it looks very classic.

I'm not into jewelry, and I can't wear earrings without getting an allergic reaction. Cheap rings leave me with an itchy rash. So I stick with timepieces. Hopefully i'll be able to afford my own collection one day!

Yesterday I went for a 2 mile run. Well...that's not exactly the truth. I ran the first mile at a 9:00/mile pace and then ran out of breath because that pace is way too fast for me, and I haven't been running in exactly two months. So then I ran walked the second mile. My muscles were definitely not used to it anymore I got an annoying side stitch. Ha! I really need to get back into it, and this was a good start.

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What happened...

To the LA Daze who used to stick to a running schedule?

To the LA Daze who used to ride her bike for miles and miles and miles?

To the LA Daze who would go to the gym to do strength training and spin class?

To the LA Daze who would be in bed by 10:30 pm and wake up at 6 am?

I have no clue. I think i've reverted back to my other passion...shopping.

And staying out late. And going to bed at 2 am. And not having a care or worry in the world. (Of course I have worries, but I try not to think about them). After all...i'm only 25 once. I just want to let go a little bit.

There has to be a balance somewhere. I just have to find it.

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How we stay in touch

Gotta love technology!

Don't mind my puffy face and super duper red lips. Looks like i'm wearing lipstick, but I never do! I still looked tired from traveling the previous day.

I finally dragged my ass to the gym yesterday. It felt good! Something about working out hard makes me feel alive. Of course I fell off the bandwagon today because I totally passed out on the couch the minute I got home.

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Sleep like a panda bear

I was going through my iPhoto and found these pictures my brother took while they were in Beijing last week:

I'm so comfy!

Ufff...I had too many bamboo shoots. Think i'll pass out here.

Rocks really make the best pillows!

I just want to hug them and pull their little black ears!!

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Hong Kong Recap

I'm too tired and I don't feel like writing a long blog post, so bullet points will do:

• It was amazing to see my family and my best friend - time flew by, and i'm happy I got to see them, but now i'm sad that i'm alone in the US again.
  
• I had an okay time shopping - bought a pair of Tod's flats (on sale), a pair of Louboutin heels (on sale), and some clothes. I expected to come home with a lot more loot (like purses, more shoes) but unfortunately this time around I just wasn't feeling whatever was (or wasn't) on sale. I actually got quite frustrated after trying on a cute pair of Ferragamo pumps, realizing they were too big, and finding out none of the Ferragamo stores in all of HK had my size left. Bah. I was so frustrated in fact, that I went online, and got myself a pair of Prada pumps that I have been lusting after. They were on sale from $600 to $225. Not a bad deal at all.
• By the way, I never pay full price for my designer shoes, unless they are classics that never go out of style. But my Louboutin pumps are classic, it's just that the stupid US doesn't have them on sale. Boo US!
• I ate a lot of good food, I am afraid to step on the scale now, but my best friend said she gained 10 lbs and she was only there for three days
• Going to HK when there is a typhoon is not so much fun. Carrying an oversized purse, shopping bags, and an umbrella, while the typhoon is dumping buckets of rain on you, is just not cool.
• Walking around HK while hung over is not a good idea. Getting off a 13.5 hour flight, skipping dinner, then go partying and drinking until 3 am does not make for a great morning. Yes, I forced myself to throw up in one of the bathrooms at IFC mall. I felt a lot better afterwards. Haven't done that in a while!!
• I was hungry all the time because of all the walking we did.
  
• I love HK and realized that after a few more years here, I want to live the expat lifestyle. It's how I grew up, and I miss it dearly. Now is not the time, but soon!
• A lot of my friends commented on how happy I looked in my pictures...and I was truly happy. I haven't felt so happy and whole in a very long time.

I am sure i'm missing out a lot of things, but I have some unpacking to do, and I just want to sleep. I feel a bit disoriented after such a long flight, and need to find my bearings. Find me on facebook for pictures if you're interested. I'd make a collage, but I don't have Photoshop on my laptop yet.

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